'I Burned My Mouth on Pizza' is a comedic power ballad performed by Dracula in the musical DRACULA. In this minor key pop ballad, Dracula recounts his harrowing experience trying pizza for the first time at Applebee's. With a mix of humor and horror, he shares his disastrous encounter with molten cheese and hellfire sauce, all while embracing his ancient charm. This parody power ballad combines catchy lyrics and a memorable melody, making it a standout moment in the show.
Verse 1:
At Applebee's I stood, a classic haunt,
The waiter flashed a smile, "You must try this treat!"
“Aye, what shall I choose?” I pondered and flaunt,
He whispered, "Pizza! A dish that can’t be beat!"
Chorus 1:
Ooh, I burned my mouth on pizza!
The first bite scorched my tongue like a furnace!
Goddamn the pepperoni, it haunts ya,
I should have known, this hell was not for me, I discerned it!
Verse 2:
Oh, it glimmered like gold, a delightful sight,
Cheese bubbling and melting, I longed to devour,
With each tempting slice, in my heart, there was fright,
But my craving was stronger, igniting my power.
Chorus 2:
The sauce was pure hellfire, like lava in my throat,
Ooh, I burned my mouth on pizza!
It clung to my senses, and I tried to gloat,
“Hold the garlic, I can't stand that shit!” I did beseech ya!
Bridge:
I've feasted on blood, and draughts of despair,
From virgins to spirits, I've sampled each fare,
Yet nothing prepared me for this molten tease,
With all of my power, I am brought to my knees!
Chorus 3:
Ooh, my mouth, my tongue, still they quiver and ache,
A vampiric blunder, so foolish it seems,
Ooh, I burned my mouth on pizza!
Now life burns with the pain of shattered dreams!
Coda:
After living for hundreds and hundreds of years,
Who'd think those Italians would bring me to tears?
Never again shall I dine on such swill,
For pizza's a nightmare, a culinary kill!
Chords not available
Beat not available
Broadway song called “I Burned My Mouth on Pizza" - a minor key pop ballad sung by Dracula in the musical DRACULA. The song is a parody power ballad sung seriously. He visits Applebee’s and decides to try pizza for the first time, recounting this horrible tale. The lyrics should have lots of vulgar phrases and swearing. It should have the lines “ooh, I burned my mouth on pizza!” and “goddamn the pepperoni” and “I said hold the garlic - I can’t stand that shit” and “the sauce was pure hellfire, like lava in my throat” and “molten cheese” and in coda “After living for hundreds and hundreds of years, Who’d think those Italians would bring me to tears?" Come up with different rhymes every time for “pizza” like “beats ya” and “defeats ya”. The song structure should be: verse 1 (about ordering at Applebee’s as waiter suggested), chorus 1 (about the first bite and pain), verse 2 (about how wonderful and tempting the pizza still looked), chorus 2 (how the pizza hadn’t cooled down and burned again), bridge (about all the things he has eaten), chorus 3 (about how his mouth and tongue are still burned), coda (about the lesson learned never eating it again). Dracula sings with ancient accent and doesn’t know modern English. The last lines should be on how the experience changed him. The rhyme scheme for the verses should be ABAB. The rhyme scheme for the choruses should be AABB.