A hilarious Broadway comedy number where Dracula shares his humorous and shocking experience of trying pizza for the first time at Applebee's. This parody power ballad captures the vampire's unexpected struggle with modern food and his dramatic reaction to the burning sensation, keeping audiences in stitches with its outrageous humor and clever jokes.
Verse 1:
In a dim-lit booth at Applebee's, oh what a sight to see,
Dracula, the lord of darkness, craves a slice of glee.
With garlic bread in my past, I dare to try a pie,
But little did I know, I’d soon be screaming why!
Chorus:
Ooh, I burned my mouth on pizza!
Should've known better, this crust is a beast-a!
Hotter than hellfire, these toppings are cruel,
A vampire's revenge in this cheesy duel!
Verse 2:
Pepperoni on the table, it looked so divine,
But the moment I bit in, it was burning my spine!
I thought I was tough, impervious to heat,
But this molten hell-fest turned me into a feeble cheat!
Chorus:
Ooh, I burned my mouth on pizza!
This feels like torture – a complete anemia!
I’m a legend of the night, ruler of the dusk,
And here I am, tasting death – it’s a must!
Bridge:
Spinning like a bat, oh how I flew,
Each second I could feel that scalding cue.
Who knew a slice of pizza could be so unkind?
This vampire is melting, oh, the shame on my mind!
Verse 3:
Now every time I see a cheesy advertisement,
I shudder and I cringe, craving enlightenment.
You’ll find me at the castle, swearing off this treat,
I’d rather drain a virgin than face that pizza heat!
Chorus:
Ooh, I burned my mouth on pizza!
In the underworld, I’m known as a tweaker!
But I’m just a fool from the Transylvanian night,
To hell with fast food – I’ll take my bites right!
Outro:
So heed my lesson learned, in this ballad I sing,
Be careful with your cravings, oh, the pain they can bring.
With garlic in my system, call me mad or bold,
But that hot pizza experience is a tale to be told!
Ooh, I burned my mouth on pizza!
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Broadway comedy song called “I Burned My Mouth on Pizza" - a funny ballad sung by Dracula in the musical DRACULA. The song is a parody power ballad. He visits an Applebee’s and decides to try pizza for the first time. The lyrics should be shocking and offensive with lots of vulgar phrases and swearing. It should have amazing jokes and the lines “ooh, I burned my mouth on pizza!”
Barbra Streisand