East Meets West: The Showtune
Warren & Ryan

[Verse 1]
Warren: 'Oy mate, what's with your bacon, eh?'
Ryan: 'It's Canadian, not your greasy UK.'
Warren: 'Scotland's got it beat, don't you see?'
Ryan: 'If by beat, you mean heart attack spree.'
Warren: 'We drink Scotch with pride and kilt, fuck you.'
Ryan: 'Maple syrup’s our jam, you barely chew!'
Warren: 'Haggis at dawn, don't you laugh too hard.'
Ryan: 'With poutine as our national guard.'
Both: 'In India we stand, cultural clash, mate!'
Both: 'Who knew bromance started 'cross such fate?'

[Chorus]
Warren: 'East meets West, we’re a bloody, funny show.'
Ryan: 'Laughter's the best, f*@k stereotypes, let's go!'
Both: 'Broadway lights shine bright, on this crazy tale.'
Both: 'Scotland and Canada, together we won’t fail.'

[Verse 2]
Ryan: 'Dude, you guys throw trees for fun.'
Warren: 'Tossing cabers is sport, not just anyone!'
Ryan: 'We’re stuck in hockey fights all night.'
Warren: 'Kilts are easy, don't they look just right?'
Ryan: 'Our winters kill, but you scotch too much.'
Warren: 'Nessie could eat your moose for lunch.'
Ryan: 'Got bears, eh? They're BFFs.’
Warren: 'Haggis'll make you face what’s next.'
Both: 'East meets West, two blokes from afar.'
Both: 'Bonded by humor in this cabaret bar.'

[Chorus]
Warren: 'East meets West, we’re a bloody, funny show.'
Ryan: 'Laughter's the best, f*@k stereotypes, let's go!'
Both: 'Broadway lights shine bright, on this crazy tale.'
Both: 'Scotland and Canada, together we won’t fail.'

[Verse 3]
Warren: 'Braveheart’s our hero, who’s your man?'
Ryan: 'Mounties in red, who stops us, try if you can!'
Warren: 'Bagpipes blow, what’s that noise you make?'
Ryan: 'Welcome to the land of loonies, for fuck’s sake!'
Warren: 'Whisky neat, no rocks, my friend.'
Ryan: 'Beer flows like river, nights never end.'
Warren: 'Castles are old but mighty, lad.'
Ryan: 'Our Rockies are breath-takers, not just a fad.'
Both: 'India made us pals, so odd, that it's fine.'
Both: 'Cross-border banter, ain’t nobody's line.'

[Chorus]
Warren: 'East meets West, we’re a bloody, funny show.'
Ryan: 'Laughter's the best, f*@k stereotypes, let's go!'
Both: 'Broadway lights shine bright, on this crazy tale.'
Both: 'Scotland and Canada, together we won’t fail.'

[Verse 4]
Ryan: 'Scots have no word for our act of kissing.'
Warren: 'Canadian politeness is what we’re missing.'
Ryan: 'You’ve got rain, so, where’s the sun then blurred?'
Warren: 'We've got culture, thank god for that word.'
Ryan: 'Moose knuckles and poutine, do you see our glee?'
Warren: 'Ghillie suits and highland games, now join me!'
Ryan: 'We’re as different as beats from different drums.'
Warren: 'But united in laughter, through all outcomes.'
Both: 'Met in this strange land, hearts open wide.'
Both: 'Friends forever, with humor as our guide.'

[Chorus]
Warren: 'East meets West, we’re a bloody, funny show.'
Ryan: 'Laughter's the best, f*@k stereotypes, let's go!'
Both: 'Broadway lights shine bright, on this crazy tale.'
Both: 'Scotland and Canada, together we won’t fail.'

[Verse 5]
Warren: 'So here we are, stage lights burning bright.'
Ryan: 'Two cultures clashing, but it feels so right.'
Warren: 'From hockey rinks to highland flings.'
Ryan: 'Bloody hilarious, the joy it brings.'
Warren: 'We mock, we laugh, we take the piss.'
Ryan: 'Friendship like this, you can't dismiss.'
Warren: 'Broadway’s the scene, our tale unfolds.'
Ryan: 'In this musical comedy, we break the molds.'
Both: 'Can't deny the bond, forged in Indian heat.'
Both: 'Scots and Canucks, in this show, we meet.'

[Chorus]
Warren: 'East meets West, we’re a bloody, funny show.'
Ryan: 'Laughter's the best, f*@k stereotypes, let's go!'
Both: 'Broadway lights shine bright, on this crazy tale.'
Both: 'Scotland and Canada, together we won’t fail.'